Billy
by tooweaktocureyou
Summary: He's got lines on his face, they tell a story of his fate. BW


**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for the plot.**

"**Billy" – James Blunt**

_Billy's leaving today don't know where he's going.  
Holds his head in disgrace he can't escape the truth.  
He knows the price that he's paid.  
He admits that it's too late to admit that he's afraid._

In the aftermath of Dumbledore's death, Bill Weasley could swear he felt a change. The carefree season of summer was altogether forgotten, substituted with overcast and constant drizzle. The weather reflected the mood of the Order as well. Everyone talked a little softer, smiled a little smaller, and rarely was laughter heard.

He also noted the change of attitude toward himself. He could feel the waves of pity hitting him when he was spoken to, which was not very often. His brothers, Merlin bless them, acted totally normal around him. Ginny tried her best to but she couldn't mask her concern. Bill felt exiled in his own life. He never looked into a mirror. And he had stopped making love to Fleur.

So on the eve of his wedding, Bill Weasley apparted to Austria.

He figured his fiancée would be furious but Fleur's anger would not hold a candle to that of his mother's. So he figured he would give his mother an explanation. Settled in his hotel, Bill began to draft a letter.

_Dear Mum,_

_I've gone mental._

He picked up the parchment, crumpled it and threw it into the rubbish bin. He began again.

_Mum,_

_I know you've probably had kittens by now, sighting my disappearance, but I must explain to you why I left. I cannot marry Fleur. Not for lack of love, I do love her more than I could ever put into words. Simply, I cannot start a life with her. Fleur deserves a husband who can give her everything, someone who could be shown off, someone to make her proud. I can do none of those things. She and I were supposed to start a life together. That cannot happen. Where could we live where our neighbors wouldn't shun us? What could we do to stop our children from being frightened at the sight of their father? I need to go somewhere that I can fit. That place is not the Burrow, or London from that matter. I love you Mum, and Dad, and the boys and Gin. I wish you all well._

_Bill_

He put on an overcoat, sunglasses and a baseball cap and emerged onto the streets of Austria. He reached an owlery a few blocks from his hotel. He attached the letter to a brown barn owl and watched it soar until it was out of sight.

Bill didn't mind Austria much. The weather was fair and he had even begun to pick up simple German phrases and words. He kept his sunglasses and baseball cap on at all times and usually only left his hotel room after dark to visit desolate pubs. Often he contemplated how long he could continue this life, or even if he should go home. Those thoughts were often challenged by a glance at his own reflection.

On one particularly rainy day, Bill made his way to the local grocery store in order to gather his weekly necessities. After he made his purchases, he trudged back to the hotel, clenching the collar of his coat to his neck. He opened the door with a bit of trouble, trying to balance his bags. Once he was in, he placed the bags on the table.

"Hello, Bill."

Bill turned to meet the voice. His blue eyes met the pale eyes of none other than Remus Lupin. Remus offered a small smile and walked into the kitchen.

"How..how did you find me?" Bill said, having finally found his voice.

Remus took a seat at the table and extended his hand, inviting Bill to do the same. Bill reluctantly sank into the chair.

"When I was bitten, I too believed that my family was better off without me. But instead of leaving the country, I hardly left my hometown. Being a ten year old werewolf, I had limited access to the world." Remus gave a small laugh and continued. "But being on your own, well, that can be worse than anything."

Bill put his hands in his head. He desperately sought the right words to say to Remus. He wanted to ask about Fleur, and about his family. But he held his tongue.

Remus pressed on. "It's foolish to think that there is nowhere in the world for you. It's a troubling life you'll lead if you continue this thought."

Remus put his hand on Bill's shoulder and applied a small amount of pressure. "You've been gone two months. Don't you think its time to come home?"

Bill stood from the table, his cheeks moist and his eyes red. He looked at Remus and nodded. They both apparated away.

_Tomorrow comes. Sorrow becomes his soul mate.  
The damage is done. The prodigal son is too late.  
Old doors are closed but he's always open,  
To relive time in his mind.  
Oh Billy.  
_

Bill had envisioned his return to the Burrow. In his mind, he would walk through the door and his mother would engulf him in a hug. His brothers would be behind her smiling and Ginny would be wiping tears from her eyes. His father would be on the side of him, patting his shoulder affectionately. Fleur would wait after his mother had let him go, then embrace him passionately. This was the scenario Bill had played out in his mind every day in Austria.

This was not the scenario that unfolded when he returned.

Bill walked through the door of the Burrow and looked around. No one was in the kitchen. He walked around the corner into the living room. He saw Ron and Harry playing Fizzing Whisbees on the couch. Ron looked up from his game to see who had entered the room.

"Bill. Hey." Both Ron and Harry had stood and shook his hand.

"Mum's gone out with Hermione and Ginny. She's gonna go mental when she sees you're home." Ron announced.

Bill nodded. "Where's dad?"

"Work."

"Right."

They sat in uncomfortable silence for about an hour. Bill had begun to doze off until he heard his mother's voice.

"Ronald! Would it have killed you to clear the table? It's nearly six! Oh of course its not your responsibility Harry, dear, Ron should have—" Molly stopped at the sight of her eldest son, now standing before her.

"Hello, Mum," Bill said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Molly looked at him curiously. "Dear Merlin! 'Hello, Mum.' That's all you'll say to me? You disappeared, William! You turned your back on this family! And on the Order! And not to mention, Fleur!"

Bill could see his mother was shaking now. The Weasley rage had gotten the better of her. "Mum, I wrote you. I explained everything. I—"

"You honestly think a letter would ail the pain you have caused your family and your fiancée? That a piece of parchment could substitute your negligence?"

"Mum, please. Lay off him. He's come back hasn't he?" Bill turned to see his younger sister emerge from beside their mother. He hadn't even noticed her presence. She looked so much older, so much wiser. And it scared him.

Ginny looked at Bill and smiled at him warmly. She walked over to him and hugged him tightly. "Welcome home," she whispered into his ear.

After she had let go, Bill held her hands in his. He stroked the side of her copper hair. "Gin, when did you get so..so grown up?"

She laughed. "Someone had to keep everyone in line while you were gone. Now come and sit, I'll start dinner while you tell me everything you've done in the last two months."

Bill followed Ginny into the kitchen while his mother made her way upstairs. Bill hadn't suspected his mother would be so angry with him but it was nice to have Ginny on his side. He sat in the kitchen and began to tell Ginny all about Austria, or at least what he had seen. He told her about all the odd characters in the pub and taught her the select German phrases he knew.

Soon Ron and Harry joined them in the kitchen and began to update Bill on the latest Chudley Cannons' games. All three of them talked so animatedly about Quidditch they hardly realized that Ginny had finished dinner.

"I'll go and get Mum. Do not start eating, you lot," she said.

After about ten minutes, Billy saw both the Weasley women making their way down the stairs. Molly dished up dinner for everyone and they all took a seat at the table.

"Aren't we going to wait for Dad?" Bill asked.

"He normally doesn't come home before nine," Ron stated.

They ate mostly in silence and when they were finished, Ron and Harry collected everyone's dishes. The four of them, Ginny, Molly, Ron and Harry, seemed to have a well sorted routine that Bill felt was created during his months gone.

"Bill." He turned to look at his mother. "I really am glad you're home." She began sobbing and wrapped her arms around him tightly. Bill let out a long-captivated sigh.

"Mum," he began, "where's Fleur?"

She let go of him and stared at the table. "I don't know how to tell you this Bill. Fleur, she's…she's gone back to France."

_  
Billy's leaving today, don't know where he's going.  
He's got lines on his face, they tell the story of his pain.  
He accepts it's his fate.  
He admits it took too long to admit that he was wrong._

Bill had hardly been home for more than four hours before he was ready to leave again. His mother had been reluctant to give him Fleur's whereabouts, knowing he would run off again.

"I'll take Ginny. That way you know I'll return," he assured her.

Ginny was overjoyed to find out she would be accompanying Bill to France. Since she couldn't apparate, they had to floo to France's Ministry of Magic. Upon stepping out of the fireplace, an extremely tall Frenchman approached them.

"You are ze children of Arthur Weazly no?"

Ginny stifled a giggle on his side as Bill nodded. The Frenchman gave them a map and some money, "For ze metro", and sent them on their way.

"Bill, have you ever been to France?" Ginny asked as they boarded muggle public transportation.

"Yeah, I was here with Fleur. We went to her parents' house to tell them about our engagement. I proposed to her at her house."

"Is that where we're going then? To her house?"

Bill paused. He didn't really believe Fleur would be at her house. She had often told him that her favorite place in France was not her house. "No. We're going to Beauxbatons."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Hey! I saw that," Bill said.

Ginny laughed. "Sorry it's just so..Fleur. To go to Beauxbatons instead of her house. She ruled that place." Ginny flipped her hair and spoke in an amusing French accent. "When I wuz at Beauxbatons eet wuz ze best years I ever 'ad."

Bill laughed. "Would you kindly stop taking the mickey out of my fiancée?"

"I suppose I can for now," Ginny said. "You really love her, eh?"

"Yeah, I really do."

"Bill," Ginny hesitated. Finally, she seemed to have found her nerve. "How do you know… how do you know when you love someone?"

"Do you think you love someone, Gin?"

"I think I do. Yeah, I might."

"And is this someone a particular Boy-Who-Lived?"

Ginny sighed and look at Bill. "That obvious, huh?"

Bill put his arm around his younger sister. "It's alright to like Harry, Gin."

"That's just it. I don't just like him. We dated, you know, for about a month. And at Dumbledore's funeral he broke up with me, so that I wouldn't be a target. But when he brought Ron home all mangled and snake bitten, we sort of…did stuff."

"Wait, when was Ron snake bitten?"

"You were in Austria, Bill."

"Oh. Right."

"Anyway, he told me he loved me. I know I'm young Bill but with this war, and with everything so uncertain. I don't feel like I'm about to be 16."

"Not that I condone you and Harry being so…intimate, but I understand Gin, I do. After this is all over, after the war, you'll be with Harry. And you'll be happy. We all will."

"I'm not afraid of your scars, Bill."

"Thank you."

Ginny rested her head on Bill's shoulder and they sat in silence for the rest of the ride.

When they arrived at Beauxbatons, Bill and Ginny went immediately to Madam Maxine's office.

"Madam Maxine, please, do you know where Fleur is?"

"She eez with ze horses out en ze courtyard."

"I'll stay with Madam Maxine. You go and find Fleur," Ginny suggested.

Bill gave her a small smile and thanked Madam Maxine before taking off for the courtyard. He saw Fleur there, standing with the winged horses. He took a deep breath.

_  
Once he was a lover sleeping with another.  
Now he's just known as a cheat.  
And he wish he'd had a mirror; looked a little clearer.  
Seen into the eyes of the weak._

_  
_"Fleur."

At his voice, he could see Fleur shiver. She turned to face him, her normally blue eyes looked pale as tears cascaded from them.

"Hello Bill. 'ave you come to retrieve ze ring you gave me?"

"Fleur, please don't be like this."

"Don't be like zat? You left me! You left me! Wuz I not good enough for you?" She stopped suddenly and looked at him with dead eyes. "Zere wuz someone else wuzn't zere? Do not lie to me, Bill Weazly!"

"No, Merlin, there will never be anyone but you. Fleur, all this time that I've been away from you. I thought I was doing what was best for you. I swear I did. But I was being selfish. What I want more than anything is to be with you, to marry you and start my life with you. I shouldn't have left. I know that now. Please don't leave me like I left you."

Fleur turned her back to him and Bill hoped and prayed that his words were enough to keep her.

"Our children will not fear you," she said in a small voice.

Bill walked behind Fleur, her back still to him. He wrapped his arms around her middle and kissed the back of her head.

"We can do this. You and me. I want you to be a Weasley."

She turned in his arms and kissed him hard.

"And you should be a Delcour."


End file.
